I grad I speak Engrish!

We always worry about Logistics in the Olympics, the getting materials into the venues and getting enough of them. We worry about getting enough water to drink and for the cables to be in the right place. We want enough information to be given to us so we can make arrangements for these camera systems that operate over, or next the field of play (FOP). We depend on drivers and translators and caterers and venue managers. Here’s the thing: Vancouver (Winter 2010) and London 2012 will have to clear the very high bar set by the Chinese. With the notable exception of the local criminal Truss Rigger, these guys haven’t missed a beat. The people are smart and positive and organized. The Olympic movement provides a proven structure that the Beijing Organizing Committee for the Olympic Games (BOCOG) has adopted perfectly. Me? I work for BOB.

We helped put the finishing touches on an exciting 120 remote controlled camera that dollies downhill at 6M/second with the Mountain Bikers. The athletes rode thru’ a course of trees planted six years ago, and have now grown 16 feet. We had one 2 hour rehearsal during which 24 machete-wielding locals came tromping down the track ahead of the fore-runners. Leading them from the rear was the daughter of the main Olympic BroadcastingSpanish geezer, shouting at us, “CHILL!”

Communication is THE daily problem here. There is NO common reference between Mandarin and a language any of us are accustomed to. No sounds, no roots, no letters to combine. But, sign language is a powerful thing. Those of us who can make rudimentary drawings can order chicken or get to the camera store. I have a 40 word Chinese vocabulary, and our driver has 20 words of Engrish, so we get by. Billy and I found ourselves in a Muslim restaurant in desperate need of beer and food, which language, pointing and whining failed to produce. I walked across the linoleum to the cooler and got two huge Tsingtaos and drew a picture of a chicken in my notebook. The outlander gave a big smile and circled the wing. We had fantastic spicy skewered wings.

They have a million volunteers, who are lovely young people (mostly ladies) who speak school Engrish. (A person who speaks conversational Engrish is bound for an Executive position here, but it is very rare with us in the field.) One questionable strategy here is to surround the louguai with many locals who may each understand a phrase here or there, in the hope that they may pool their understanding for the guest’s benefit, like schooling fish. Given time, it works, but it’s not for the impatient. Often I wish I hadn’t sought a finer understanding and asked that last question…

Contrary to pre-game claims, cabbies only speak Chinese, but they are pretty good and very cheap. Dunwoody to Forest park would cost about $8. It’s easy to find a cab from our hotel (in Tucker) to the restaurant district, but the drivers don’t want to bring us back out because they’d have to deadhead back south. So now we just climb in the cars and refuse to get out ‘til we get back to the Bin Guan. The cop at the door of the BinGuan requires the driver to tell him where he picked us up. Some hotels have cops on the hallways, and they note departures and arrivals at rooms! We hear maps were illegal here a few years ago and the drivers regard them w/ the countenance of a cow looking at a new gate (C. Watford quote)

We make sport of trying to move thru’ the Hotel garden bar w/out becoming attached to a lovely young Chinese person. “Can I herp you, Sir?” “Not unless you’ll assist me behind that dark bush to urinate.”

While shopping at the Carafour, I was followed thru’ several floors by two uniformed teen-agers. I gave them the stink-eye and circled a display of Happy Sesame Biscuits three times by which time they slunk away. I was the only round-eye in the 4 story grocery, and they caught up w/ me on the beer aisle. BTW, I have pictures of Pabst Blue Ribbon WATER!

There are lots of people in China.

Where’s my cable?

I’ve fallen behind in describing things here in Beijing. During working hours, it’s life as usual within the Olympic bubble. (After hours, find our way into Chinese neighborhoods for dinner and shopping, but more about that another time.) We await cable and power and production decisions while we try to get our robo cams in place and functional. Even though they have more money than anyone, BOB seems to throw People at a job rather than funds...

My venues are Whitewater and Rowing, and Triathlon, and our setting is in the scenic area north of this city of 400 Million. (Just made up that number, but it’s big!) Whitewater (or canoodling) is conducted on an artificial Slalom course that takes the athletes about 40 seconds to run. It’s fun to watch, particularly while it’s just us and the boaters. Billy and I have two remote Pan and Tilts to bolt to blue plastic “rocks” in the course.

The television truck, or OB Van in Euro speak, is from Sweden. The Production team are Slovenian and the engineers are Aussies and Canadians and the Cable Cam guys are Austrians with Gimmick beards. And that’s just in our little paddling venue! Thank God I speak Engrish! Every one else around here speaks several languages but for we Americans and Aussies and etc. American and Aussies are two people divided by a common language...

There are a few old Spaniards left high up in Olympic Broadcasting. There are we grey beards from Atlanta in ’96, and middle aged rough necks from Australia (delightful in small groups!) and young technicians from Greece. We all work for BOB.

There are lots of Chinese People:

Your canoodling team were called away to the Aquatics building last Saturday night to help our Engrish friends recover time lost when the local truss-hangers neglected to run power to their chain motors. Anyway, the skin of this building is bubbled, and is variously lit from within, and it’s a really great effect. Words and designs projected on the exterior of the building from within.

At the Olympics, getting there is half the fun. Unbeknownst to us, a hundred thousand people had turned out for a dress rehearsal for the fireworks at the adjacent National Stadium (The Bird’s Nest). It was a nice scene here as people demonstrated their pride in what China is becoming.

Maybe Atlanta will have two perimeter highways some day. Beijing has six of them. We abandoned our four cars on Ring Road 5 and sent the drivers on without us and walked for an hour thru’ the crowd as helicopters roared overhead and the Bird’s Nest emitted fireworks. BTW, the Chinese are good at fireworks. Worked all night, standing on dock sections floating on the pool while we hung cameras and camera track on the track that would be wound 20 meters above the water. It was fun.

Here's an odd thing: The day before the rehearsal, the air cleared. Blue sky clear as a bell. Next morning, socked in as per usual. Rumour is, they're seeding the clouds and trying to manipulate the smog for the opening ceremonies. Another rumor is a giant firework dropped from an aircraft. I listen. I hear things.

(didn't mean to pick on OZ. They're the best on the job and in the bar!)

Air and Cars

THE most reported story in the Olympic Games will be the lack of visibility. Yesterday morning was the first time I realized that my 7th floor room was surrounded by Communist-looking high rises and that the city is ringed with mountains, which explains the haze. Some mornings we can't see to the edge of the hotel property. One of the first clear days in weeks.

The hi def cameras that we point at the $3 Billion stadium from the prototypic robo platform 40M off the ground sees nothing! It's like looking at a diamond ring in a bowl of milk. So, the lazy reporter who can't crack the substantial language barrier can always report on the fact that she can't see across the street! We'll hear this story every day, and it's too bad because the Chinese people are very sweet and deserve to be successful.

I hope they recorded all the beauty shots yesterday and can just play them back as if they were live. This way, a million people can drive their cars again and go back to work. Too bad for the long distance runners, but they must be in love with misery anyway, so they'll be right at home in this air.

I looked under a Strada crane platform yesterday and saw lots of little green frogs, so maybe it's not so polluted here after all?

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The taxi caravan to dinner is a scene from a video game as we all tail gate around the hairpin ramp that'slit up like a pinball game. Driving is a new pursuit here, and we Laowi just want to know where to put in the quarters and see what will happen. The roads have been thinned of the usual traffic to make we for we imported Olympic Officials, so our drivers are the cocks of the walk, blaring their horns at the bicycle trucks full of melons and barking curses at the uniformed tool booth attendants. We carry Chinese characters to convey our destination, and draw clocks to arrange pick up times. Maps weren't legal until fairly recently, and I haven't seen a good one yet.


We were thrilled when our 3 car caravan stopped on the expressway and backed up to the exit we'd just passed. At our venue, Rowing and kayaking, there is a compound with 300 shiney new bicycles that no one's allowed to ride because bicycling is too dangerous.

Olympic guards. In Greece we’d refuse to stop for the police unless they stood up from their plastic coca cola umbrella chairs and motion for us to stop our speeding tiny SKUDAS. (Dude, I’m not stopping unless you get up off your ass!) On we’d go. Not here. We drive past 3 KM of young (army?) guards standing absolutely erect at attention, completely alone in a suburban corn field.

Arrival in Beijing

Connected thru' Chicago with my ole mate, Billy Sherrill. In 14 hours, the sun never set on this flight over the pole to the Middle Kingdom and yes, the north pole does seem to have melted and broken up. Beach Front may be in YOUR future.

The Capitol Airport is a soaring architectural statement and our train twisted thru its course like a Disney ride as it brought us to claim our bags. Can China raise an army of Olympic Volunteers? YES, they are legion. We could have been struck by paralysis and they would have bourne us upright thru immigration, credentials, baggage claim and to our cars.

Our hotel, the evocativly named conference center #9 is lovely, with Marble atrium and cherry appointments in the room. Attendants are everywhere. One brings a fork. Another brings a knife. The 2 meals so far have been wonderful, even the Mexican takeout today for lunch at the field shop. Cheech and Chong, I call it.

So, off to try to buy a $40 phone for personal use. We won't speak about my losing my wallet at the Atlanta Airport, 5 miles from home....

Xie Xie,

JK